My Double Bubble Bath

P90X: Day 1 (Again)

Wow. Discipline is totally hard. I'm a little surprised that I only lasted one day. And I have a billion excuses. In fact, if you were to stop me on the street, (or even more common) leave a post on my Facebook wall, I could generate a hundred totally excusable things that came up that made it impossible to do day 2. I was prepared to start the second disk when a conversation with an old high school buddy helped me have an epiphany. "Drape, you can't start Day 2 unless it immediately follows Day 1," he said. "Now you have to start over on Day 1 again." The first disk, Core Synergistics was a nightmare. I did not want to have to do that one again just yet. My core was as soft as a mealy apple.
"So you mean, I have to do these things in a row?" I asked.
"Yep." he said.
So I realized something about exercise that has deeper relevance. It's not what you do that matters but it's the fact that you do it habitually. It's like compound interest. You can't expect a return when you invest a dollar in a savings account when you're 5 years old. But if, starting at 5, you create a habit of doing it every day, by the time you're 18, you'll have a ton of money.

In an age when my seniors want their pictures the same day and brides are asking me to text them photos of their wedding as I'm driving home from the reception - instant gratification has become even more instant. In fact, many of the excuses for why I didn't start Day 2 had to do with work. The problem is that in my life, exercise is not in my top 10 of priorities. Especially when it doesn't yield gratification instantly. I think I would probably be more apt to do it if I could see inside my muscles and heart and see things improving. From the outside, things don't look so hot. In fact, I look worse after exercising than I do than when I started.

My dad used to run daily and would tell us that it cleared his mind and helped him think. I have experienced the same thing when I've run but yet it's so hard to do. I heard a speaker in church say that discipline, once achieved in one aspect in our life, helps us be more disciplined in other aspects of our lives. I'm convinced if I can discipline myself with the 90 days it takes to finish P90x that it will help me be disciplined elsewhere.

I started Day 1 again tonight after going on a mile run first. I measured myself first because I really want to see some improvement -- I'm motivated by it. I sweat like a freak and lasted until about 18:30 left in the workout. I still can't do the Sphinx pushup for some reason. I don't think those muscles ever developed in the womb. They certainly didn't develop once outside it.

Measurements:

Up until about 30 or so I was a 32 inch waist... just wanna brag a little before I throw down my current stats.

Waist: 35 (Morning McMuffins and extra large Cokes have a lot to do with this measurement)
Muffin: 37 (Yes, there is a 2 inch disparity between my waist and my muffin.)
Right bicep: 14.5 (If it falls below 14, it's physically impossible to hold a 85mm f1.2 lens)
Right quad: 20.5 (my quads used to be so big in high school that I had to buy BugleBoys because my thighs wouldn't fit in Levis where my waist fit.)
Weight: 195
Height: 6'1.5"

I checked my BMI (body mass index) online and typed in my stats. I am overweight according to the chart. Normal for my height is 140-189 pounds. This is news. Seriously. It's also motivational.

P.S. On a lighter note, don't eat anything spicy before you work out. I ate some scrumptious (a word used by foodies like myself) chicken tortilla soup from Costco for dinner. I added some Tabasco sauce. Part of the reason I didn't make it all the way through was due to Tabasco burps.

Self-Diagnosed MuffinTop

          I'm 37 years old. In my mind, I'm 25, or somewhere around there and some would argue I'm younger still. Yesterday I went to the birthday party of my niece and nephew. As a good uncle should, I entertained the youngsters playing soccer in the rain. This enabled a sometimes grumpy/sometimes happy (she's pregnant and hormonal) sister to arrange her birthday party extravaganza on the only day it rained all month. When I awoke this morning my legs hurt and my right arm hurt. My legs hurt from kicking the ball around for about 15 minutes and my arm hurt from attempting to throw a stick "javelin style" up onto the roof so that I could be the hero and hang the pinata. Didn't ever succeed but my arm was sore from trying. It's tough to say because at one point I was in pretty damned good shape. I played soccer from the age of 8 until I was 27. The effects of that lasted a long time but have now worn off. I'm not any adjective that would be used to describe an athletic shape. I've had enough. The other day I saw my back and there was rumpled skin. I have a muffin top. I'm not gonna lie. I guess it's best to put it out there. If you looked at me you'd never know I looked so bad underneath. It really came to my attention when Angela, the observant and ever so blunt Italian co-worker, asked me why I was wearing "smedium" shirts. I had no idea what she meant. Then I realized my shirt was hanging over my pants. I could no longer wear the shirts that I once wore. The rising of my dough-like tummy made the shirt not fit as long as it used to. You must keep in mind, this has never happened to me before. I have never not been able to fit into my clothes. I take that back, I gained 15 pounds living in Genova, Italy eating about 1kg of focaccia and a liter of Fanta every morning. Due to some medications I've been on, namely prednisone, I've gained a whopping 23 pounds. I used to weight 175 and now I weight 198. I am 6'1" for any of you who do the ratio thing.
          I was whining about my situation to my buddy Eddy the other day and he told me he was doing something called P90x. I had never heard of it and don't buy into the gimmicky exercise fad crap. I consider it the pyramid schemes for the skinny. The skinny and athletic promote them to the people like me, who want to be like them. I'm so tired of being in this state of muffin nast, that I decided to try P90x anyway. I have brides that are doing it apparently and many people I know are starting to see results. Maybe I will too.

Just finished the first session of P90X. Looking a little bedraggled.

          I just finished my first session called "Core Synergetics" or something to that effect. I could not even do all of the exercises. I felt like I needed the weanie ones, like doing push ups from your knees. The host is a little annoying and I think even he knows it. He put an option for doing the exercises without the volume. All I remember is he keeps calling one of the girls "Blam." That and he annoyed me a little bit when he didn't even really do all the workout. Just when he started to get tired he'd head to the black guy in the back (who was ripped like The David) and tell him to do a deeper lunge. The session was an hour long including warmup and cool down. I hope to be able to do them all eventually and not feel like such a loser. I didn't do all the reps either. I had to sit and make sure the sweat pouring off of my head didn't get into my eyes or all over my weights and mat. Don't get too heavy of weights either. I have 20's and I think I'm going to go to 8's even. I'm not ashamed to say it. Let's just say my arms plus ragu would have looked like spaghetti. Forget the banana thing. You flip around and turn up like a banana and then turn over like superman. I think I'm gonna feel that in the morning. I just wish I lived on a farm and could stack wood and do some farm work for a living. Then I wouldn't have to work out. I'd be working out at work. Instead, I have to work AND work out. I'm not sure how long this is going to last. I will put a picture of my muffin top up when I hit 30 days. I'll put it up with my 30-day photo. That way I won't be so incredibly embarrassed.
          If anyone has any tips at all or anything they'd like to share on how they keep motivated. Post that now. As you can see from the above pic, I'm a big sweaty mess.

Pink Panties

Stained undergarments look dirty. And dirty is synonymous with stink. Nothing looks worse than a dirty-looking undershirt. The Laundromat smelled of powder detergent and bleach. The washers sloshed and the dryers droned away performing their daily duet. I came in search of a washer that didn’t leave my whites dingy like the washing machine in my apartment. To my conspiracy bent mind, it was simple: the apartment complex used recycled water for the washing machines to save money. Their water was gray and so were all my whites.

I put my whites in a sparkling top load washer and had begun to read the USA Today and sip a Starbucks. The sounds of the Laundromat were mesmerizing. The only other sound came from the overhead TV; a black judge was telling a plaintiff that her boyfriend owed her money for the big screen TV he purchased with her card. I tuned out and went back to my newspaper.

The door flew open and a muddy-booted man walked in with a spaghetti ball of laundry in his arms. A grey sock with red stripes fell and was orphaned from the laundry family. Shirtsleeves and pant cuffs drug on the ground as he stomped his way down the rows and shoved his laundry into a machine. I wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d brought a stick with which to mash his laundry – his arm sufficed.

“Bill, you dropped my sock on the dirty floor!” I turned and saw a large man with suspenders and ruddy cheeks holding up a muddy sock. He wore a Tap Out shirt and the same muddy boots as his friend. The “dirty” floor was now dirtier due to a mud silhouette.

“Bring it over here Walt. Throw it in with this load.” Walt walked over and tossed the muddy sock into the washer while Bill poured in liquid detergent. The two men left and opened the back of a filthy Ford Explorer to reveal laundry packed to the ceiling. It was packed so tight it caused the men’s muscles to bulge underneath their t-shirts as they pulled it out. They entered the Laundromat with arms full.

“Fill ‘em all up,” instructed Bill. He motioned to the 4 rows of washing machines.

“Are you using these,” Walt asked me.

“No, I’ve just got these whites here,” I said.

“You came to a Laundromat for one load?” asked Walt. “Seems like a waste.”

“My washer at home turns my whites grey, so I came down here to try and get them clean.”

“It’s important to have clean undies,” laughed Walt. This coming from a man whose undoubtedly were not clean. I laughed.

“Yes it is.” I patted my washing machine and Walt shuffled over to the change machine. He put his dollar in and nothing came out. He bumped his meaty fist on the machine a couple of times. Nothing. He pounded the machine for an obnoxious minute and the machine spit out 4 shiny teeth.

“How many quarters are we gonna need Bill?”

“I don’t know. Figure it out! There are 15 machines, they each take a buck fifty in quarters,” shouted Bill from across the room.

“I’m thinking about 20 bucks then,” responded Walt. I was thinking at least that. Walt left for a couple of minutes to go next door for his change. Bill continued to march back and forth depositing laundry into every empty machine.

“Looks like you saved up,” I said as he came in through the door on one of his trips.

“Yeah, we live out in the country and I don’t have a washer. I was just going to go to the Goodwill and buy some more clothes but I realized there were so many in the garage that I couldn’t get to my motorcycle. I figured I’d better wash ‘em.” He stuck a thick finder into his lip and pulled out a black mass and threw it into the garbage can.

“You sure you aren’t using any of these?” he asked.

“They’re all yours.”

“Thank you.” He put his last load into a neighboring machine just as Walt came back in. He emptied some change into Bill’s hands and the two began starting their machines. Within minutes every machine in the place was going. I got back to my newspaper. It was the several minutes of silence that caused me to look up from my reading. I found the two men staring into the front of a side load washing machine. They seemed bedazzled by the sloshing of a washing machine that was side load. It had a port like a submarine and you could watch the clothes slosh back and forth. It was like a windshield wiper in the rain.

The two broke from their laundry coma after several more minutes and became interested in the judge show. Both were drawn in by a biker who’d promised several women his bike and then reneged on his arrangement. I glanced over at the machine that had attracted their attention for so long and then realized the water had begun to turn red. I looked closer and could only see whites. A commercial came on and both men’s attention came back to their submarine port.

“Son of a bitch!” said Bill. “Don’t just watch, help me open this door!” Both men began tugging on the door of the washing machine and pink water began dripping out of the sides. They grunted and yanked but despite all their efforts, only managed a pool of pink soapy water at their feet.

“What did you leave in there?” asked Walt.

“I’m not really sure,” answered Bill. “I must have left a shirt in there or something. I’m not entirely sure what it was.”

“Hope those aren’t your underwear,” I said with a grin, “because I think they’re gonna be pink.” Walt slapped Bill on the back and with a loud guffaw and repeated what I had just observed, “Pink undies! Pink undies!” he goaded. Bill looked mortified. He shook his head and swore. Apparently, he didn’t think pink undies would coordinate well with his numerous Tap Out shirts.

“Isn’t there a drink called a Pink Panty,” laughed Walt. “You can sip that while you wearing ‘em!” Bill’s face was stoic.

“I’d rather wear none,” he said.

“Hell, I never wear any,” said Walt. That was about as much information I wanted to know from these men. I put my laundry into a dryer and decided to come back in about 25 minutes. My whites looked white and I was thankful that they weren’t dingy and grey. Things can always be worse.

Brooks Landing Apartments Modesto

Here is another clip from the rooster saga. EVERY morning, and now night, this rooster crows like crazy. I ended up waking up and filming him as he crowed every 15 seconds. If you want a peaceful night's sleep, DO NOT MOVE HERE. Enjoy the documentary.

Brooks Landing Apartments Modesto

It's been a long time since I've rented an apartment. So long in fact, that I forgot what it was like if you make a poor decision when determining your living geography. Brooks Landing hadn't been open long when I soon found myself in need of some temporary housing. There were few reviews online. The only ones there seemed to be positive with one lone griper. Now that the complex has had some time for people to move out, the truth (in the form of complaints online) seems to be pouring out faster than the exodus that's happening at Brooks Landing.
There are several options to consider when thinking about renting here and I'll spell them all out so that you might not make the same mistake I did. Before I have someone from the complex comment on me, I'll steal a move from Eminem in the movie 8 mile and dis myself on their behalf. I have been late on my rent several times. There. :) Now, there's nothing they can say. Other than that, I'm an optimal renter. I am quiet, keep to myself and unless there is something that makes it impossible to sleep, I don't call the security girl on night watch. She doesn't like it when she has to get out of bed to go bang on someone's door and I don't blame her. The girls who work here are polite and I have nothing negative to say about them. If you ask for anything at all to get done though, you will get the same response. Their hands are tied by corporate. It's an effective way to pass the buck to a Bermuda triangle. Let's begin our assessment now of Brooks Landing.

1.) So that was the gate. This is troubling because anyone and everyone can come and go as they please. This means people that live here and people that DON'T live here. There is no security guard that patrols and watches the parking or people hanging around your vehicle. The gate permanently stuck open means that thieves can enter quickly but most importantly, exit quickly.

Question to ask staff: "When will the gate be fixed so I can receive the security I pay for?"

Security for Brooks Landing: F.

2.) (Picture 1) While the view is picturesque, DON'T let it fool you. I took this picture to show where the roosters live. Every morning at about 4:30 a.m. and on weekends, the roosters crow for an hour or so. They do it nonstop and repeat every 4 minutes until they are assured that the barnyard and everyone at Brooks Landing is awake. There are four horses in this backyard that run around all summer long and kick up so much dust it makes Pigpen look clean. The dust settles all over the balcony and anything you leave on it. It also settles on the steps and all over the rails. If you forget, and you will, you'll get a handful of dirt all over your hand as you walk up the steps. It is an absolute nightmare if you have asthma. (Picture 6) This is where vomit used to be. It's been like this for about 5 months. Someone puked on the steps and left it there. As the puke dried the grease set in and stained the cement. I jump over this step.

Question to ask staff: "Is there a rooster that crows every morning at dawn?"

Cleanliness at Brooks Landing: C-.

3.) Either my hearing gets better as I get older, or the walls here are made of lace. The last two evenings I've heard people screaming obscenities at a football game below me. I'm sure it was TEVOE'D because it was 2 a.m. And I get to hear the couple argue next to me every single night. The fights are bad and the making up is worse. Move a little so your head isn't banging up against my wall. OMG. Two couples were fighting in the parking lot inside the complex for about an hour. It was about midnight when they started.

Question to ask staff: "Can I go into an adjacent apartment and yell and see if my spouse can hear me?"

Noise at Brooks Landing: D.

4.) Parking is always tough at apartment complexes. You have to fight for every inch, especially in the evening when you come home from work. Brooks Landing has assigned parking so that you will always have a place to park. (Picture 2) In the 9 months I've been here someone has parked in my spot an average of about once every two weeks. This isn't bad. It's only bad when you can't find a single other spot in the complex to park and end up parking outside the gate. (With the gate broken 80% of the time I guess it doesn't even matter.) This is a problem when it's pouring down rain and you have to walk a city block to your apartment. When your spot is stolen you can report it to the office. You are educated on the fact that the car in your spot has to be there 72 hours before they can tow it. This effectively negates assigned parking. If someone can park in your spot for up to three days before they're towed, they can simply park in someone else's spot for a day or two before they come back to yours. So the sign posted in picture 2 is just for decoration and to make it look like you'll get a spot. When you're spot isn't being taken completely, it's being taken enough where it makes it hard to get out of your car. I walked out into one parking lot and found 2 offenders. Many residents park over the line on a regular basis. This makes the spot next to them unusable except for an interesting game of twister as you try to slither out of your door crack. (See pictures 3 and 4) This doesn't seem like much of an issue but it is. Especially when the person who parks next to you makes it a habit of parking over the line.

Question to ask staff: "Am I guaranteed a parking place? What do you do if someone is in my spot?"

Parking at Brooks Landing: D+.

5.) The pool and spa area seem nice on the complex's website. And they are - when they aren't broken. I sat in the spa once since becoming a resident. Since then, it's had a blue tarp over it and has been out of operation. It's been more than 8 months since it's worked. It would be really nice to be able to use some of the amenities that help sell residents on Brooks Landing. The pool is clean and sparkly and when I tried to get out by pulling on the metal ladder, it swung around and came out of the cement. Apparently it's been broken for some time and nobody has gotten around to putting a small amount of cement at its base. These are all little things that increase the experience at an apartment complex and are reasons people choose to live here.

Question to ask staff: "How long has the spa been broken and what date will it be fixed?"

Pool and Spa: F.

6.) The interiors of the apartments are functional and ordinary. The units come equipped with a washer and dryer as well as a garbage disposal and dishwasher. I love the dishwasher and disposal. The dryer works well too. The washer is mysterious. I'm not sure where the water comes from but from the looks of my clothes (especially whites) it comes from water that was used previously by my dishwasher. Weird brown spots have appeared on my whites and lighter shirts. I've tried bleaching my whites but to no avail. They refuse to be white. The mystery was solved by frequenting a laundromat where my whites always come out sparkling and the browns that used be whites are getting less brown.

Question to ask staff: "Where does the water for the washing machine come from?"

Machine Perks: C.

7.) The temperature in the winter for an upstairs apartment stays right around 80 degrees. This is with the balcony door closed. It is January 31 at 7 p.m. and exactly 50 degrees outside. I opened the balcony door and bedroom window and it is now 77 degrees. If you run hot like myself, opt for an apartment on the ground floor. It's easier to get burglarized with the absence of the security gate but it's a lot cooler. I'd hate to see what happens if I were to use the oven.

Question to ask staff: "How warm does it get in the summer in an upstairs apartment?"

Eco-Friendly Design: C-.

8.) Free Lattes!! And, you can add Brooks Landing to your friends on FaceBook (according to their sign). (Picture 7) What can I say? I've never had one of their free Lattes but I'm sure if I asked...

Question to ask staff: "Where is my free Latte?!" and "Will you add me on FaceBook?"

Marketing strategy: A- (Cheesy but hey, free latte!).

In summary, this is just my experience since I've been here. I work long days and am not even here very often. But, the constant noise and bickering on my side of the complex, coupled with the rooster have given me reason to take my leave. When I Googled the apartment complex it appears the worst grade is yet to be given. The customer service when you leave the complex equates to a scam. People are being told one thing by the managers and then being billed the contrary by "corporate." Massive fees are being charged to couples who were told that their apartment looked great. Google the stories, there are many and frankly it scares the crap out of me. It looks like I'll be adding to this post when I leave.

New Year's Resolutions

I've heard if you don't write your resolutions down, they are just wishful thinking. Since I've never written any down and usually don't hold myself accountable to them, I thought this year I'd change that.

1. Write letters.

(I'd like to try and write more and text less. My handwriting has morphed into something that I can't read anymore and that's both embarrassing and confusing when you can't read the notes you left yourself.)

2. Leave the country.

(This isn't meant in any unpatriotic way, I just like to roam far when I do roam.)

3. Work out. 

(Isn't this everyone's? Ok, I'll be more specific: to look like that kid Taylor on Twilight. In human form obviously.)

4. Go to more live concerts.

(There is something so moving about live music and productions. I think the whole Ipod/digital music revolution has sterilized the connection that live music provides the soul.)

5. No more eating in my car. 

(I just can't do it anymore. My car has been a mess and I'm sick of it.)

6. Finish the studio.

7. Don't drive like an ass.

8. Enroll back in school and finish my degree.

9. Get published.

10. Work on my homeless project.

11. Maintain my blogs.

12. Host more workshops.

13. Watch a Photoshop lesson a week.

14. Don't get too busy to be inspired.

15. Get my chipped tooth fixed.

16. Wake up at 6 a.m.

17. Organize finances.

18. Buy a house.

19. See more professional sporting events.

20. Play more golf.

21. Lose 15 pounds.

22. Avoid places that charge ATM fees, or bring cash to these places.

23. Fill my change jar.

24. Read more.